May 2013
2 posts
2 tags
The Weirdest, Craziest Fad Diets Of All Time →
Swimsuit season is right around the corner, which means the pressure to get the “perfect” bod is on
1 tag
sad cheerleader: 10 Things Daria Taught Me About... →
sadcheerleader:
The late 90’s animated MTV series, Daria, made cynicism and snarkiness cool. Let’s be honest - she’s the original sad cheerleader (OSC?), paving the way for all those who came after her. AND she taught many of us lifelong lessons, like:
1) Coffee = God
2) High School, People, Life -…
April 2013
7 posts
1 tag
Top 5 Reasons Why Take Your Child to Work Day...
1.) Your team will have to babysit your spawn while you take phone calls, attend meetings, go to the bathroom, get coffee, eat your lunch, or step away from your desk for any reason whatsoever. You’ve put them in an uncomfortable situation because they feel beholden to you, but are NOT into your child at all. Therefore, they will hate you, and probably feel like this:
2.) Your...
“Miss Rhode Island, please describe your idea of a perfect date.”
– (via sadcheerleader)
1 tag
1 tag
Top 5 Ways to Pretend You're Busy at Work
We’ve all been there. I’ve had an office job for like two minutes and I already have figured out the best ways to surreptitiously do whatever you want when you think no one is looking. Although probably they are. I will most likely be fired sooner rather than later, but that’s neither here nor there, because I am being paid slave wages, and am always a little bit nervous that one of...
an apology to commuters
To those of whom work between the hours of 9 and whatever:
I apologize for judging you. I projected a sincere distaste for those of you who rise before 8 am, get on a bus or a train, and go to your place of employment with 8 zillion other human beings. I felt morally superior because I had the capability of sleeping till 10 and taking a two hour yoga class smack in the middle of the day. I got...
December 2012
2 posts
3 tags
freakin weekend.
Borrowing from the illustrious #sadcheerleader’s terminology, I spent my weekend in the FUPA of New York City - weird sort of midtown east. On Friday night, my college aged sister was with her friends at a bar called Copia, the pinnacle of Bridge and Tunnel madness. We actually managed to have a blast, despite the fact that our father picked us up like we were still in high school and called me...
Hotel lobbies are like human zoos. So much hilarious behavior by people completely unaware they are being observed.
November 2012
2 posts
2 tags
fedualist inspired servitude still lives in modern...
“RAFAELLO!!!!” “Vieni qui adesso, per favore!” “RAFAAAAEEELLLOOOO!”
My alarm sounded on a brisk mid-October morning, ceaselessly reminding me of the fourteen hour work day that lay ahead, and all that was ringing in my head was her voice. It was a thickly accented Italian one, overwhelmingly musical despite the fact that it was blatantly laced with irritation. The lack of sleep was starting to...
Dear Holiday Tourists,
If you are going to insist upon clogging my city’s streets, could you PLEASE not do it while walking four deep at 3 miles an hour while actual residents are trying to commute home.
Many thanks,
A stereotypical disgruntled New Yorker.
October 2012
1 post
4 tags
a twenty-something guide to the presidential...
Like most of America, (well, except for Yankee fans, Red Sox fans, and South Park fans) I tuned in to watch the first presidential debate last night, something I have been looking forward to for weeks. I was ultimately delighted confounded disappointed.
Let’s talk openings. Obama’s attempt at humanizing his responses went over like a lead balloon. It’s great that you and...
August 2012
2 posts
Do you ever walk down the street, not rushing, and feel completely content to exist exactly where you are?
It’s this time of year, right before fall. Change is in the air and you can feel something magical is about to happen. It just has to.
The Door Bitch: You know you've become a foodie... →
thedoorbitch:
You can smell truffle oil from miles away.
You bring obscure spices to your friends houses to cook dinner.
Your DVR is full of food network shows.
Your DVR is also full of Man Vs. Food episodes.
You stay in on Tuesdays to watch CHOPPED.
You discuss recipes with strangers instead of talking…
July 2012
2 posts
city woes
city grime, city heat
city victories, city defeat
city stifling, city sweat
city demands have not been met
city wanting, city needing
city just keeps on repeating
city can’t, city won’t
city shouldn’t, city don’t
city yearns, city grows
city sorrows, city woes
city lunges, city tries
city never says goodbye
city fosters, city cares,
city pushes, promises,...
two if by sea
It’s amazing how little it takes to make you feel humble. While walking home amid the torrential downpours that engulfed New York City today, reminiscent of that age old biblical flood that prompted Noah to build that silly ark of his, I had a strange thought:
I couldn’t hear anything.
Somewhere off in the distance, yes, my irritatingly sensitive hearing could pick up on the...
June 2012
2 posts
Happy accidents
As the season of fun steams up the island of Manhattan, all the goals I had made post-Asia are slipping a bit further from my ineffectual fists. My dreams of renting a house in the Hamptons are nothing more than a pipe dream, a New York City fairy-tale we little girls hear about but never quite reach. My dreams of procuring a “real job” become slightly less exact as I roam about the...
“Nilla wafers remind me of CCD, and they just don’t do it for me, kind of...”
– Kaylin Tavolacci
May 2012
8 posts
The last week and a half has reminded me of how homesick I was. It was the little things I noticed at first. The way summer is beginning to creep across the city, enveloping the skyscrapers like a dense fog. The smell of New York street food pervading the air, the hot dogs, pretzels, chestnuts, and spicy halal carts. The slightly musical yet jerky sounds of the Spanish language, echoing in the...
Sometimes you have to leave New York to really appreciate it.
-Meghan Kenny
Today I bonded with my dentist over our shared dislike for Vietnam. There has been no greater comraderie since Nader inserted himself between Obama and McCain.
More Asia thoughts
Gains
Acceptance of dirtiness, smelliness, smog, bugs, and general gross stuff
Learning you need to eat every 3-4 hours in 97 degree heat
Ditto Hydration.
Playing legends of the hidden temple at Angkor Wat
The best fish and pad Thai on earth
A profound respect for Imodium
Ability to function on very little sleep
Temples temples temples
Not killing your travel partner.
Sunsets.
Sharing...
So Hanoi right now.
So I am slightly less enraged than my last post. The trip to Hanoi came dangerously close to breaking me. Not one especially built for third world traveling, I always knew this trip would be trying, but this particular leg has been the most challenging so far. I’ve been struggling to grasp how people can travel for months on end without losing it, but I think that the limited time we have...
Fuck you, Vietnam.
20+ hours on a shitty bus. Kindle and supa cool ray-bans stolen. Brand new paintings recently purchased in Hoi An gone.
WELCOME TO HANOI. And fuck you very much.
Saigon (or Ho Chi Minh City)
Saigon was a BUNDLE of laughs. No, seriously. Between aliens stabbing daggers into my stomach and going to see the Vietnam War Remnants Museum, I pretty much cried for all of Saturday. OH, and apparently Saigon is called Ho Chi Minh City now by everyone. And by everyone I mean the government who renamed it. Our open city bus ticket says Saigon-Hanoi. Totally normal.
For some reason...
Chiang Mai
After a disastrous 18 hours in Phuket, we arrived in Chiang Mai on Tuesday morning (May 1st). OUr cab driver dropped us off at the wrong hotel, so we had to take a songthon (sp?) which is basically a truck version of a tuk tuk that costs 20 baht and acts as a shared taxi. We finally found our hotel (in 90 degree heat) and went out to grab lunch. We were starving and it began to rain, so we...
April 2012
8 posts
koh phangan-bali-lombok-gili t-phuket
The rest of Koh Phangan was a delightful blur, ending with one of the island’s semi-famous black moon parties. We decided to forgo scuba diving, something we had been toying with the whole trip, mostly because I am a scardey cat, and opted to spend another day at the beach. We rented jet skis, which was great fun as always. On Friday we decided to take a day trip to Ko Tao, which was a...
Koh Phangan
Koh Phangan was the highlight of the first half of my trip. Who can say what makes something your favorite; why do some people prefer mint chocolate chip ice cream and others chocolate, but I know that this was my favorite island of them all. Perhaps it was because we had stayed here the longest (though I doubt it) and got to know the island better, perhaps it was the wonderful people we met...
no sleep 2012.
I am currently in the Suvarnabhumi (sp?) airport in Bangkok, waiting for my plane to board, and they randomly have computers and internet for FREE! Obviously a serendipitous occasion, as is blogging on two hours of sleep. Please excuse any spelling or grammatical errors due to exhaustion. Haven’t been writing much because the last five-ish days have been so magnificent (minus the 7 hours...
Continued
At the second travel agency we waited an unprecedented 30 minutes or so while the men in charge ( and I use that term very loosely) attempted to figure out who was going where. We got on the bus around 11:30, where we waited an additional 10 minutes for our arrogant, non-english speaking driver to eat breakfast. Once we departed, we stopped yet again at another travel agency while our driver did...
Ko Lanta
On Friday the 13th, we were picked up at 9:30 for what was supposed to be a 2-3 hour trip to nearby Ko Lanta. In Thai time, this obviously means 4-5 hours. Here is a brief description of what traveling here is like:
Picked up at 9:30 by man in a purple van who speaks no English, drives at 7-10 mph, and is playing American country music while rearranging his three foot long wheat sticks (yes,...
Updates from paradise
Apologies to those who have been following my travels for the lack of updates, the past few days have been busy and ultimately eventful.
After an excruciating eleven hour bus ride back to Bangkok from Siem Reap, we spent a relatively chill night in Bangkok, grabbing delicious grilled fish and stir fry veggies at a street near our hotel, followed by cocktails and half hour foot massages. (The...
Maybe Angelina ain't so crazy
So we’re here in Siem Reap, Cambodia, which is not a ‘hood from the hunger games but in fact the home to Angkor Wat, which has to be one of the most magnificent places in the world. We awoke at 5 am (by the crowing of roosters…this is Cambodia after all) and grabbed a Tuk Tuk in order to make it to the temples by sunrise. It was a cloudy morning so the sun didn’t burn away...
There's a reason no one sings about Bangkok.
Its important to recognize when traveling that there are certain elements of big cities that remain consistent across the globe. (and I am literally across the globe). They will always be crowded, slightly smelly, loud, pushy and erratic. Roads stop and start for no rational reason whatsoever. A sign pointing one way may lead to a place you never intended to go. There are wild animals...
March 2012
1 post
February 2012
2 posts
For every person who's ever asked me where I get...
http://www.healthybitchdaily.com/?utm_source=Daily+Subscribers&utm_campaign=b6aae795c0-Apples_and_Arsenic9_25_2011&utm_medium=email
“Life and love are life and love, a bunch of violets is a bunch of violets, and...”
– Dh Lawrence
January 2012
6 posts
Reasons why people are fucking stupid
I’ve noticed lately that my blog entries have been getting a little deep, so I wanted to include this comprehensive list to lighten the blogosphere and iterate my contempt for the stupidity of humanity. Enjoy.
1.) They were dropped on their heads as infants.
2.) They are French.
3.) They were birthed by equally (if not more so) moronic parents, teaching them their idiotic ways and...
Loyalty and love are not mutually exclusive. They are bound. Like interlaced fingers. Like a solid step touch. Like old friends who knew you when you made a lot of stupid life choices, who you knew when they made a lot of stupid life choices. Who you love despite each others questionable taste in music. Who you dance with, full out, at inappropriate moments, reminiscing about when you were younger...
why people are eating less meat. and why it rocks. →
eat your heart out, carnivores
Much thanks to the illustrious Ami Patel for the forwarding of this article. Xx
“Be mindful even if your mind is full.”
3 tags
muscle memory
The holidays are stressful. This is a fact. As I have said before, this is especially true for those of us who work in the service industry. I worked six days a week for most of December, and I am officially burnt out. Working on your feet, helping others celebrate their holidays while you skip over your own, creates a certain sense of….well, malice in your attitude. Dark shadows cast...
December 2011
7 posts
you don't know what you got till it's gone
Just in time for the holidays, I was struck down by one of New York City’s most irritating little freak of nature: the stomach virus. Thursday morning rolled around, and I had a fantastic day planned.
I was in an uber-productive mood, had a list from the ceiling to the floor, and confident I could get all my last minute holiday do-dads completed in time for work. There was a slight...
jigga what? →
Thomas Jefferson wasn't the only one pursuing...
Fulfillment.
This pesky little three syllable word keeps the minds of most humans turning and whirling. Maybe not most. Maybe just me. Still, it’s a tricky one, how it sneaks up on you. Constantly nagging at me. It’s meaning pokes and prods at me in the oddest of moments. When I’m crossing the street, or getting my nails done, or waiting for the subway. What does it...
Always down to break it down.
